Coercive control is a form of abuse where one person tries to control another person’s life and make them feel afraid or trapped. It’s not always about violence, but it can be just as damaging.
Imagine a relationship is like a game of basketball. In a healthy game, everyone plays by the same rules, has a chance to shoot, and respects each other’s skills. But in a game with coercive control, one player tries to control everything and make all the calls. It’s unfair and not fun for anyone but that one player.
Warning signs of coercive control
- They tell you who you can hang out with and get mad if you see other friends.
- They always check your phone and demand to know who you’re texting.
- They put you down or call you names, making you feel like you’re not good enough.
- They try to control what you wear or how you look.
- They pressure you to have sex even when you don’t want to.
- They threaten to hurt you or themselves if you don’t do what they want.
- They make you feel like you’re always walking on eggshells, afraid of making them angry.
Here’s what we have to Say
- Love isn’t supposed to feel like this. A healthy relationship should make you feel happy, supported, and free to be yourself.
- It’s never your fault if someone is controlling you. It’s their choice to act that way, and it’s not about anything you did or didn’t do.
- You deserve to be treated with respect, even if the person controlling you says they love you. Love shouldn’t hurt or make you feel trapped.
- There is help available if you’re in a relationship like this. You don’t have to go through it alone. Reach out to a trusted adult, a counsellor, or an organisation for support.
